Kathie Donovan | The Wellings

December 16, 2019May 3, 2024

The Season of Giving

Here we go again: another Christmas season is ramping up and I wonder:

Are you ready?

I don’t mean are your gifts wrapped and under the tree. I mean are you ready for all of the silliness that comes with long to-do lists and unexpected sideswipes that can invade what should be a joyful time of year.

After all, we’re celebrating the birth of Jesus and birthdays should always be enjoyable, right?

Our challenge is perspective.

Somehow over the decades, we got lost in the wonder and magic of a Coca Cola promotion that stuck. Now for the most part, instead of the central focus of the season is about the all-important life lessons Jesus

taught like kindness, forgiveness, and compassion, at the center of Christmas is a jolly fellow in a red suit, who flies around the world delivering presents to hopeful children and adults who trust that Santa has their name on the nice list and not on the naughty list.

I love the magic and beauty of the decorations, music and special food prepared at this time of year. I have my own tradition of making a plum pudding that my Mum and God Mum made for decades and the white fruitcake that my husband’s Mum made; it wouldn’t be Christmas without them. For me now, this season is about kindness, forgiveness, and compassion the gifts you won’t find in stores…they’re one size fits all and everyone needs them.

As anticipation is building and shoppers are shopping, what I’d like to recommend is a focus on the gifts we really need in our world.

We need more presence; not presents. We need to acknowledge one another, be there and care for each other.

What about the neighbor whose child or spouse passed away or the new immigrant who might not have a community here? Could we not deliver some kindness or compassion to them over this Christmas season? How about delivering a smile to your neighbors and your family, asking how they’re doing and then really listening to the answer?

Joy and happiness are not dependant on our bank balance, our age, size, nationality or our status.

Happiness and joy are cultivated in our hearts and once shared freely with others have an amazing ripple effect.

Experts who study kindness say that even when we observe someone being kind, we benefit. So there you have it: you give a gift; you receive a gift.

This festive season, give a little bit of love to everyone you encounter.

It could be that your kindness, empathy, and compassion are the Christmas miracles that change someone’s life.

Kathie Donovan
Currently a Wellings Ambassador and Living Well Advisor, Kathie was Canada’s
broadcasting sweetheart for almost three decades as well as co-host of the beloved television show Regional Contact. Kathie is a gifted storyteller who shone a light on characters and creative types tucked into small towns. Her love of connecting people, caring and sharing is inspiring. Kathie has authored two books with a third on the way; she continues to build on her annual event “Refresh Your Passion” and other workshops. Kathie’s priorities are to love what she does and live well.

This Wellings blog by Kathie Donovan was exclusively written for Wellings Communities and appeared first on MyWellings.com.

in Healthy Aging Posted by Kathie Donovan

September 6, 2019May 3, 2024

The Kindness Effect

“Kindness is the one size fits all gifts that everybody needs.”
-Kathie Donovan

Science is finally catching on to the kindness movement, recognizing that thoughtfulness is not a sign of weakness but a healthy and meaningful habit.

What may appear to be a very simple act is actually a rather complex experience for us humans. Even observing kindness can have an impact on us. We experience kindness in our heart as in “his kind act touched my heart” as well as in our head because we remember kindness and are sometimes inspired to be kind to others as a result of having the experience.

When I was researching my first book Inspiration in Action: A Woman’s Guide to Happiness, I had a study group who would play along with some of my ideas, one of which was an experiment called The Mindfulness Project. I challenged the participants to carry out simple, thoughtful acts for other people for one week. Some were asked to give compliments freely for a week, others were asked to buy someone a cup of coffee, or smile at three people. The results were inspiring, as each person reported back that they felt the power in a small kind act, even when they weren’t the recipient. Science calls this effect “helpers high.”

Acts of kindness have tremendous physical benefits. Showing kindness, releases the hormone oxytocin, which produces nitric oxide that helps lower blood pressure. Oxytocin also supports good self-esteem and optimism. So, next time you’re feeling shy, show someone some kindness and you’ll feel the benefit too.

“In the same way that it wouldn’t take much to turn your day around, ask what you could do for someone else.”
-Kathie Donovan

A few years ago, I used a simple strategy to spread kindness. I wrote thank you notes on a piece of paper, folded it in half and placed it under random windshield wipers in the parking lot, outside my doctor’s office, outside a hospital, in a very full downtown parking lot; always when I thought nobody could see me. The message inside would say “you have a beautiful smile” or “you make our world better by being here” or “you are loved,” you get the idea. I’d write For You on the front of the paper and leave it under the windshield wiper. While I’ll never know how those messages were received, I know what I intended and I definitely felt that “helpers high.”

The cool thing about kindness is that it’s absolutely free. Kindness is a smile, looking someone in the eye, saying thank you, giving compliments freely. It’s assisting someone when it looks like they need it, it’s doing something kind for someone and not telling anyone about it.

Kindness can be learned and it’s an excellent habit to cultivate because kindness has magical powers. The kinder you are to others, the more kindness comes to you in ways you would never anticipate. Kindness when practiced regularly helps to reduce stress and leads to a feeling of wellbeing.

If you choose to see the world with kindness instead of fear, you’ll have a much better day and everyone around you will benefit. I challenge you to foster kindness in your community and notice what a difference it makes for you and everyone you encounter. All you have to do is ask yourself what small act of kindness could you do for someone to make their day brighter? Then enjoy doing it. Be kind; live well.

Kathie Donovan

Currently a Wellings Ambassador and Living Well Advisor, Kathie was Canada’s broadcasting sweetheart and co-host of Regional Contact for almost 30 years. Kathie travelled the Country shedding light on attractions, causes and talented artisans tucked away- off the beaten track. Her love of connecting people, caring and sharing is inspiring. Kathie has authored three books, continues to build on her workshop series “ Refresh Your Passion”, and is currently taping a new TV show, yet still has time to love what she’s doing and live well.

This Wellings blog by Kathie Donovan was exclusively written for Wellings Communities and appeared first on MyWellings.com.

in Healthy Aging Posted by Kathie Donovan

July 30, 2019May 3, 2024

The Power Of Connection And Community

I remember what it felt like when I walked into a new classroom in grade school, after my family moved to a new city. I felt so alone and uncomfortable until I connected with the people in my class, which didn’t take too long. I’ve experienced that same feeling over and over throughout life whenever I’ve been courageous enough to join a class or a new group of any kind.

You’d think we’d learn that the feeling of being alone doesn’t last very long but fear often wields its power to keep us from trying new experiences because fear’s job is to keep us safe and comfortable. Ultimately, I believe we’re all looking to feel connected and we’re at our best when we’re part of a community. Our fear is quickly eased either through conversation or shared activity, just like it was when I was in grade school. Our work then is to ask fear to take a seat while we get on with the business of exploring the amazing opportunity communities have to offer.

Science shows us that human beings are born for connection and we thrive when we’re part of something greater than ourselves. Today, young people often refer to their group of friends as a tribe, borrowing from history and they’re not wrong. We thrive when we’re with our tribe because ultimately community is where we feel valued, seen, heard and appreciated.

Communities have a powerful effect on our wellbeing: emotionally, physically and spiritually; helping us feel socially connected and providing a sense of being part of something meaningful. In our digital world, on-line communities can provide a touch point without us having to be together physically but nothing can replace the relationships we make when we’re together in person.

As human beings, we need familiar threads to tie us together: family is a great example. Although not perfect, a family’s story has commonalities and provides a sense of belonging that we attempt to replicate throughout life. Depending on the stage of our life it could be a social circle, a spiritual group, a workplace family or the community we choose to live in.

Just as our roles in life shift, the importance of connection and community shifts as well. We are meant to continue learning and growing as humans, so as we retire from full time work or become empty nesters, joining a group or community offers focus, engages our imagination and enriches our social skills. How about learning a new language, volunteering, joining a dance or yoga class; perhaps taking martial arts classes?

As we age, our focus should be on enjoying a good quality of life: maximizing friendship, health and happiness. Living well at The Wellings means being part of a community where everyone is encouraged to thrive, where everyone has an opportunity to contribute, where there’s reduced stress, opportunities to make new friends, learn something new and above all feel safe when you’re at home. This tribe is fuelled by the enthusiasm of its members and supported by the staff; I just don’t think you’ll find a better definition of a freedom living community than the lifestyle enjoyed by folks who live at The Wellings.

Kathie Donovan

This Wellings blog by Kathie Donovan was exclusively written for Wellings Communities and appeared first on MyWellings.com.

in Healthy Aging Posted by Kathie Donovan

February 25, 2019December 15, 2023

An Open Conversation About Change

Has this Happened to You?

You go to the produce department of your grocery store and they’ve moved your favourite vegetable or fruit. Now you have to go searching for its new location and along the way you notice some items you didn’t know were on the shelves.

You might even pick up one or two new things. Discovering date butter recently, while looking for fresh blueberries was a revelation for me.

Retailers understand the need to change their displays to keep things fresh and their customers interested but the idea doesn’t always apply to our day to day life. Really, many of us are what financial planners call risk-averse.

I’m guilty as charged when it comes to managing my finances however the rest of my life is filled with risk because I’ve learned to use my superpower of courage. Believe me, I wasn’t always so eager to change things up.

Embracing change is not a natural thing for us humans and we find ourselves complaining about it because we’re wired for safety. When we think change, often we think discomfort, right?

We’ve been trained through how we’re wired as humans and through social conditioning to resist changing anything. Our beautiful brains have intricate systems to keep us protected. When we feel threatened or pushed to make some kind of change or change is happening around us and we can’t control it, we freak out a little…or a lot depending on the circumstance and all we want is to get back to the safety of life before this perceived disruption.

What we’re really afraid of when it comes to change is being outside, what we describe as, our comfort zone. It’s that feeling of familiarity with surroundings and behaviours, where we can predict what will happen with some confidence.

Stepping outside that zone makes us feel unsettled because we can’t predict what will happen and often we choose not to take action as a result.

Of the 40,000 – 60,000 thoughts that we have rolling around in our brain every day, I’d be willing to bet some of them are about changes you’d like to see happen in your life and others are about why you shouldn’t do anything about it.

So How Can we Learn to Embrace Change?

First of all, we need to understand that our brain can change how it operates; the great news is that we’re not stuck with the wiring we came into the world with.

The science is called Neuroplasticity and it refers to the idea that we can rewire our brains not to fear change so much, in fact, we can learn to embrace change; it’s all in how we choose to think.

Some of the change we experience in life is a result of being alive…anybody else noticing a little drooping of this and that? Other change is within our control and some change is out of our control.

Faced with any of the above, we have a choice: we can either accept or resist and this is where the magic happens. It’s in our choice.

If you’ve met an older person with a youthful spirit, someone who was interested in you and has a lot to offer, then you have witnessed what I’ve just described. Remaining open-minded, being kind and courageous, making ourselves life-long learners all contribute to making us feel ageless.

I like to joke that people 55 plus today are part of generation ageless because that’s how I want us to see ourselves. Sure, change happens but when we’re open-minded, change looks more like an opportunity for growth than a threat to our safety and when we grow, the focus is always on improving our lives.

We, Humans, Crave Continuity, Yet One Thing We Can Be Sure of in Life is Change.

I think the best question we can ask ourselves is what are we really afraid of? In the answer will be the key to acceptance because when we start to get clear about why we’re afraid, it’s usually not as overwhelming as we initially perceived.

Having compassion for ourselves is a big part of learning to embrace change and sharing our fear with others who have compassion for us is important as well.

See change as a natural part of life instead of an interruption because it is natural and learning to embrace it by participating in it instead of fighting against it will bring surprising results.

When We Know Where We Fit In, We’re More Likely to Take a step in a new direction.

We need to feel like participants in every step of our life’s adventure. While it may be tempting to allow someone else to take care of your business, they may not give you the result you really want.

So, navigate change with your friends and family; don’t be afraid to seek a professional’s advice if it’s an unfamiliar subject. Continue to educate yourself and share what you fear, so you can find clarity.

Do the research, ask questions and talk it out with others going through similar experiences. It’s important to know what your priorities are, when it comes to navigating change, so you can prevent others from imposing their ideas on you rather than remaining neutral and giving you the space to make informed choices.

Enjoy your life….go to the movies, set up coffee dates, do yoga, whatever makes you feel good and fills you up, will be great support as you navigate change. Learning to embrace change is work and its work worth doing because your happiness depends on it.

Changes in our lives should be working for us; not the other way around. Live well; be well.

Kathie Donovan

This Wellings blog by Kathie Donovan was exclusively written for Wellings Communities and appeared first on MyWellings.com.

in Carefreedom Living® Posted by Kathie Donovan

The Season of Giving

The Kindness Effect

“Kindness is the one size fits all gifts that everybody needs.”
-Kathie Donovan

“In the same way that it wouldn’t take much to turn your day around, ask what you could do for someone else.”
-Kathie Donovan

The Power Of Connection And Community

An Open Conversation About Change

Has this Happened to You?

So How Can we Learn to Embrace Change?

We, Humans, Crave Continuity, Yet One Thing We Can Be Sure of in Life is Change.

When We Know Where We Fit In, We’re More Likely to Take a step in a new direction.

Natalie Tommy

FREDDI RODIER

“Kindness is the one size fits all gifts that everybody needs.”-Kathie Donovan

“In the same way that it wouldn’t take much to turn your day around, ask what you could do for someone else.”-Kathie Donovan

Has this Happened to You?

So How Can we Learn to Embrace Change?

We, Humans, Crave Continuity, Yet One Thing We Can Be Sure of in Life is Change.

When We Know Where We Fit In, We’re More Likely to Take a step in a new direction.

“Kindness is the one size fits all gifts that everybody needs.”
-Kathie Donovan

“In the same way that it wouldn’t take much to turn your day around, ask what you could do for someone else.”
-Kathie Donovan